Looking back over my New Year’s Resolutions for 2018 I am proud of how many goals I accomplished, and I do think writing it out helps us to achieve. One thing, however, was missing from my list for 2018… Have a baby. I did not start this year with that in mind. In fact, she was a birthday wish in March when it just felt right. I also never wanted to put the pressure on myself by setting it as a firm spoken goal to get pregnant. I’ve always sort of considered it as something that would or would not happen as it was supposed to, which is very much my approach to how I live now and a fantastic way to keep stress low.
So here I am, 9 months pregnant looking forward to 2019 not only as a new year and a new beginning but a whole new life! I expect a great adjustment period and I’m prepared to give it the time it needs to settle. I already long for my work, the mental track I follow to deeper creations, which I was on before derailing to feed another human growing inside me. My goals this year have less to do with professional accomplishments and more to do with redefining my place in the world as a mother and co-parenting partner while still nurturing myself as an independent creator.
As I write out my New Year’s resolutions in no particular order I wish you all the success in yours on this new year….
- Have a baby.
- Be present. Single handedly one of the best life changes I have adapted to since moving to Provence has been the ability to be totally present. Though I have mastered being present in a way that is beneficial to my body of work and personal well being, I have yet to experience applying it toward another human being. I must make sure to be present for bébé, for every moment, and be open to letting that experience guide me in a new way.
- Learn French.
- Make Macarons successfully
- Find a bigger space to live (while keeping the current space as a dedicated photo studio).
- Continue to work with more French brands, expanding my knowledge on all things French
- Renew the French visa without so many difficulties this year and/or transition the visa into an artist visa for France.
- Allow myself the freedom for my personal work to develop in new unexplored directions influenced by the experience of becoming a mother.
- Experiment freely!
- Write more
- Finish the book on my life and work in Provence (!!!)
- Experiment more with the process of foraging flowers, silica flower drying, then pressing to ultimately start making flower art designs specifically for my body of work in France
- Figure out a better flower pressing method for larger florals
- Continue to share photography tutorials
- Continue to build an open conversation for creatives on my Instagram platform
- Write a guide to Provence!
- Open an online store to sell my print editions
- Workouts! Starting with country walks with bébé, to the yoga and barre classes I can now drive to now that we have a car and when I’m ready, to begin running again.
- Do not let stuff accumulate. Something that terrifies me about babies.
- Raise our child the way that is right for us
- Allow myself to be a mother but know that I am not only defined by this one thing. I am still me, and when I am ready I can be both.
- Drive to Italy
- Take a cooking workshop in Italy!
- Take the ferry to Corsica
- Explore the English countryside
- Take bébé to visit the Loire Valley in the spring and stay in a fabulous Chateau
- Eat at Noma
- Visit San Sebastián, Spain
- Share more real life candid moments
- Shoot more film of raw unedited life
- Use the car as a tool to explore more of France and dig deeper into my photographic work, observations on life in Provence and foraging for subjects in still lives
- Learn how to make baby food
- Make more videos
- Make the perfect broth
- Figure out French daycare system (crèche)
- Give myself time to adjust to being a mom and enjoy every second of her before pressuring myself to start producing work
- Build a darkroom
- Continue my design collaborations with new inspiration based on my ability to now get out and explore more of the countryside
- Keep the car clean (meaning free of stuff inside as well)
- Consider creating abstract works that blend the story of Provence with memories, textures, and light without being literal scenes with the intention to print large scale.
- Turn my journal into an artistic time capsule with Polaroid transfers, pressed flower arrangements and my thoughts hand written out
- Draw more
- Learn Calligraphy
- Take the Belmond from Paris to Venice!
- Save for a family home